Rupture & repair

Nobody stays in sync

If you’ve ever looked away at the wrong moment, or said something sharp at three in the morning, you’re in good company. Research on babies and parents suggests that even close, healthy pairs are out of step much of the time. What seems to matter is the repair: noticing, coming back, trying again.

Here are a few ordinary moments, with your baby and with your partner. There’s no score. At the end you can keep the words that help you come back.